May 2, 2016

Next Step - Decisions

A lot has happened since the last blog post. Daron's mental state has continued to drop to the point that I am now responsible for all medical decisions. The doctors decided that his durable power of attorney for health care needed to be put into place because Daron is no longer able to make his own informed decisions. The first decision I have to make......whether or not to put a feeding tube in.

I knew this decision was coming, but that doesn't make the decision any easier. Reality has just hit me full force in the face and now I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I know Daron has to be suffering through all of this. I don't want to see the suffering continue and I don't want to go against his wishes. I want to honor the man that I married - the man who told me that he does not want any life-sustaining artificial treatment. That's exactly what a feeding tube is - an artificial way of providing nourishment and medication directly to the stomach to sustain life.

If I choose not to have the feeding tube put in, that means that he will go into hospice care and begin the end stage of his life. Hospice would keep him comfortable, maintain his pain level and hopefully let him enjoy the time he has left. His suffering might decrease some, but there's no guarantee.

I'm at a loss as to what decision to make right now. I'm praying that God will guide me down the correct path as He's done before. I'm praying that God's will will be done through all of this. I'm praying that Daron will not suffer any longer and that God will grant him mercy. I'm clinging to the comfort I have in knowing that God ordained all of this before the foundation of the world. God already knows the day and time that Daron will enter Glory & im thankful for that.

This decision will be made on Wednesday morning after I've had a chance to talk to Daron myself. I'm praying that he will be clear minded enough to express himself. I don't take this decision lightly and I want to make a fully informed decision. I covet your prayers through the next few days.

1 comment:

  1. Praying for wisdom, clarity, grace, and peace. And sending hugs.


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